Dear Abby,
Wise woman, tell me what to do!
I need to get a clue from you!
You see, I love the Engish king
And want to wear his wedding ring!
He's married to his brothers wife
And says he's stuck with her for life!
But she is old! Her eggs are poor!
She can't have children anymore!
And Henry wants to bone me now
Because he hates the Spanish cow!
But I won't crawl into his bed
Unless I am the queen instead!
So should I listen to his plea
And let him have his way with me?
Or should I stand up firm and tall
And just say "No no!" after all?
Yours Truly,
Anne Boleyn
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Dear Anne,
You silly girl, you need to chill!
If you don't bone him, someone will!
So get yourself knocked up tonight
He'll get divorced and make it right!
The Ages are not Dark no more
And no one's gonna call you "Whore!"
You'll be the queen and wear the crown
And he'll send Cathy out of town!
Sincerely Yours,
Abby
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Dear Abby,
He dumped her and I am the queen,
I laid an egg, and Hank is mean!
I didn't have a Tudor son
And Henry's really craving one!
He's looking at some other broads
Who may have slightly better odds!
He wants a boy child really bad
And says I blew the chance I had!
So now I'm in the Tower jail
And no one's gonna pay my bail!
I made the King of England scoff
And now I'll get my head cut off!
So give me some real good advice
Before the headsman takes his slice!
How can I get another chance
Before the guy gets here from France?
Cordially Yours,
Anne, the Queen
**********************************************
Dear Anne,
You have no reason to complain,
And I think you're a royal pain!
You were the queen, you had the crown
And now it seems, you've fallen down!
Don't ask me for some further aid,
Because of rotten eggs you laid.
So meet your fate, and lose your head
Cuz Jane is writing me instead.
Tsk Tsk,
Abby
Painter12952
